So we woke up this morning, went to our closet, and found the pair of glasses we used as a prop back in college ’cause the easiest look for us to pull off was that of a geek which we kind of already were. We put it on again and decided to walk around the house wearing it. We were alone and it was a Saturday morning. We got every reason to be extra comfortable and play our Amy Winehouse, Etta James, Nina Simone playlist which nobody else listens to at home (’cause my family’s music is lame). Alternative music should be played in the afternoon while the sun sets; that’s our rule. The Killers should only be played at night preferably while traveling, Snow Patrol at the wee hours, and Bon Iver and Jeff Buckley when we contemplate on the meaning of life.
We don’t wear glasses. Just like our grumpy grand dad, we were given good vision and we plan to keep it at least until we experience quarter life crisis at the age of 75. Yes 75, because we like to age in a biblical level ’cause nachos and salsa. But thinking about it, a pair of glasses could bring us a handful of good things.
We might have mutated and now possess pheromones that drive people away but sometimes it’s not enough. A pair of dark rimmed glasses might just give us the power to intimidate people while we speak at a rate of 180 words per minute. Or maybe not ’cause it’s actually our brains that do that talk that our speaking vocabulary is reduced to “yes” and “nope” and their numerous variations.
Also a pair of glasses makes us look a bit older which is good when you could pass for a high school student when clean-shaven even at the age of 24. We know it’s good for some people but it doesn’t help that much when you try to manage an IT project; the clients find it hard to take a little boy seriously. Yes, it’s not just our face, our skinny frame contributes a lot to it. We could’ve been okay with our body though if finding clothes that fit perfectly doesn’t take us ages.
Lastly, a pair of glasses completes our look in our villainous fantasies. I agree that mosquito repellents should be sprayed on a swarm of mosquitoes to make them hate each other. With that, Sasha the mosquito would no longer bite you ’cause Stacy got to you first and she’s like the most abhorrent mosquito ever. Sasha would take pleasure in watching you swat Stacy though.
Or maybe I should not wear glasses at all. -aB
Featured Image By: ~sakurawolfgirl